Decisions: Stay or Leave?

The decision making process is never easy no matter how much you think, rationalize and even lose sleep over making a difficult decision. Big decisions often cause serious stress in your life. A decision that can be very difficult is deciding whether to leave or stay in a relationship. We all know that there’s no such thing as a relationship without challenges. However, some stumbling blocks are merely garden-variety, while others are bona fide deal-breakers. Determining which ones are which can be tough especially if other factors are involved such as love, kids, money or the fear of starting over and being single again. This conundrum faces many people in relationships. One day everything is going good then before you know it you might be considering ending it. Although it may seem tempting to end a relationship over a few petty arguments or disagreements. I tend to believe that minor differences shouldn’t be the end of something that could potentially be great. On the other hand there are somethings that are deal breakers and should always be talking seriously. Now, usually this is the point in most of my post where, I might offer solutions for this decision and what signs you should look for before you make your decision.  I might suggest to ask yourself questions like do you consider leaving, because why spend your time miserable when you only live once. Or do you consider staying, because leaving would require sacrificing your reputation, disappointing people you love, and having to start the whole “starting over” phase.  How you make this decision is an essential part of what makes you, you. One is not better than the other. No matter your decision to stay or go, be as aware and deliberate as you can. Try to work on making it better life for yourself, rather than letting it make you. No one can tell you whether to stay or to go. No one has your perspective and no one can know how leaving would affect your life and what truly makes you happy. This is a difficult decision to have to make for yourself whether you elect to stay or go is truly your decision. Comment below if you have made this decision before and how did you decide whether to stay or leave.

Copyright ©2016 Jay Colby All Rights Reserved


About Jay Colby

Some would categorize me as an entrepreneur, life coach, son, friend and all of the above. I’m just another person trying to find my way in this world. Until recently, I was unsure what my path in this life would consist of. Like many others I was between I know what I want to do but not sure if that’s what I’m supposed to do. I am currently finishing my degree in something that has nothing to do with becoming a writer or entrepreneur so automatically it qualifies me to become one right! Follow me as I go through this journey called life to impact and encourage one person at a time.
This entry was posted in Advice, Relationship, Single and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

46 Responses to Decisions: Stay or Leave?

  1. Wow. This really does make you think about current and past relationships. So glad I stumbled across this post, thank you!

    Liked by 8 people

  2. signedlife says:

    This is definitely a situation that I can relate to …

    Liked by 5 people

  3. emmagc75 says:

    I have stayed because we love each other very much. He’s always there for me and we have a great relationship. The only problem is a lack of sex and that has taken a toll on the marriage.

    Liked by 4 people

  4. Lexie M says:

    Such an interesting post- I have been here and it was the hardest decision I’ve ever made. I left, still loving him. But I had to as I was so unhappy. We tried again a while later, but so many things reminded me of before that I couldn’t stay, even though it broke my heart again X

    Liked by 5 people

  5. Great post! I ended up leaving because I knew it was going nowhere. Soon after I found someone much better for me 🙂

    Liked by 5 people

  6. I feel so much of it has to do with having the balls to listen and act on what our guts tell us. We know the right thing to do….. It is being able to do it.

    Liked by 5 people

  7. Renee Lishka says:

    I didn’t make the decision to leave or stay. I was afraid to leave and I was afraid to stay. Ultimately someone made the choice for me and I was left with it whether I liked it or not. I suppose that is better in the end because I don’t think I have the balls to make a decision.

    Liked by 5 people

  8. This was a very insightful read. I have found that I have stayed away from relationships because of things like these. I consider myself very ’emotionally fragile’; I hate hurting people whether intentionally or not and since it usually involves some form of confrontation which i absolutely abhor, I tend to stay away from them. I am hoping by my next relationship I would have toughen up and be able to face things like these should they come up because I am that person who would quit a relationship after a minor argument out of fear of confrontation.

    Liked by 5 people

  9. Tikeetha T says:

    Great post. I made the decision to leave because I realized that I could no longer sacrifice my happiness and that of my son. It was a tough decision, but my momma always said “When you get tired of eating shit, you will get up from the table.” Crude, but true.

    Liked by 7 people

  10. Dehan Taylor says:

    I left because my happiness comes first. If I am not happy I cannot make another person happy.

    Liked by 7 people

  11. invisible25 says:

    I made the decision to leave as I felt like I was losing myself by making someone else happy and becoming depressed. There have been times where I want to run back but I know this is the best for me. I’m worth a lot more than that!

    Liked by 5 people

  12. What an eye opening post! I am still in limbo. My husband has been out of our marital home for a couple of weeks or so due to my choice in response to his habitual infedility; however, I still do not feel confident in my decision to divorce him. It’s hard to believe that 9 one night stands and 1 affair later, I am still not confident in my decision to leave. I secretly wish he would straighten up or leave me once and for all since I do not seem to have the courage to do it.

    Liked by 3 people

  13. Asil says:

    I feel as though cheating in any form: emotional or physical is a deal breaker. At that point both people in the relationship should evaluate themselves and the relationship. Like you said, cheating is a choice, it is not inevitable. Someone chooses to sleep with someone else, or to talk to someone even when they know they may have feelings for them. If person X really loved person Y they wouldn’t cheat, no matter the circumstances. I think people who cheat are truthfully really dirty and it is just so disrespectful to the other person. You owe it to that person to end things, or to be honest about your feelings INSTEAD of cheating on them. If you know that the love is no longer there be upfront about it. Be honest with that. That will be hard to hear but it is a hell of a lot better than living a lie, and believing that someone loves you, only to find out that they were cheating on you. I feel like in a relationship, when you really love someone, it may be hard but you can find yourself looking past, forgiving, but never forgetting things that the other person has done that has really angered you, hurt you, or just negatively affected you because you care about them. But, when it comes to cheating, even though it is hard I know that I would have to let that person go. It is sad that people would choose to stay in a relationship after something like that happens, because it is never an accident.

    Liked by 4 people

  14. Candy says:

    Great advice. And there is never a right answer. We can’t see into the future to see what our choice will result in.

    Liked by 4 people

  15. ASHOUZA says:

    Reblogged this on CONSTRUCTING THE ALTER EGO and commented:
    SO TRUE…

    Liked by 4 people

  16. ASHOUZA says:

    Definitely Staying for the sake’s of Kids… and I do believe in “soulmate” kinda thing even though being seperated for almost a year now…

    Liked by 4 people

  17. geminilvr says:

    All so true, great post Jay

    Liked by 4 people

  18. beloved200 says:

    Choose to leave when the relationship is not healthy for the both of you. 🙂 🙂 leaving or staying have a reasons too. It is maybe good or bad reason. But let us not be afraid of what we decided because God won’t leave us. Remember He stayed in us. 🙂

    Liked by 4 people

  19. If a relationship brings out ‘the worst’ in you, it’s definitely time to let it go. I have learnt this from experience. And as much as it hurts to let go, it hurts even more to remain in a toxic relationship.

    Liked by 4 people

  20. PTcontender says:

    I left after ‘staying’ too many times. With my ex, I stayed so many times after something hurtful happened, and it was like after each hurt I was better prepared for the next time he hurt me. So, finally I just up and left. Best decision I ever made. I didn’t realize what a relationship was supposed to be!

    Liked by 3 people

  21. Holly Ann Kurt says:

    Separate into separate paragraphs! This is really daunting to read as a mega long paragraph Lol. Just friendly advice 🙂

    Liked by 4 people

  22. Wow, such truth in your post! I’ve had to make the hard decision of leaving certain family relationships. I had to realize that my hope & idea of a great relationship isn’t going to negate the reality of the negativity that those relationships presented. It’s never easy but sometimes leaving is necessary, as you said, you only have one life to live. Thank you for sharing!

    Liked by 3 people

  23. kplifeblog says:

    I’m still deciding whether I want to stay in my relationship or leave, it’s a constant back and forth struggle for me!

    Liked by 4 people

  24. GirlsMyAge says:

    Thankfully I haven’t been in this situation yet. However, when I have to make a big decision, I often consult my mum because I feel like she gives great advice. Of course God’s Word is what we can always rely on to guide us in making decisions

    Liked by 3 people

  25. I always weigh out pro’s and con’s of a decision. I don’t go to others for advice, I seek God’s word. Then I take my time and make my decision based on how big or little it benefits me or others if they are involved.

    Liked by 3 people

  26. I’m going through this questioning right now; of course, this isn’t the first time I have done it, but it seems critical right now.

    Liked by 2 people

  27. enterfuntech says:

    Decision making in realtionship is very tough either you wanna stay or leave.It means alot and bring a lot of stress in one’s life. your post is impressive.

    Liked by 3 people

  28. Anisha says:

    brilliant post Jay…looks like you got us all thinking! 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  29. There’s a lot to be considered here, certainly food for thought!

    Liked by 2 people

  30. Anonymous says:

    Really nice and inspiring. Totally love your blog!

    Liked by 2 people

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