Having standards for our lives is a common practice in our society. Majority of us have standards for different areas of our lives whether it is a certain neighborhood we want to live in or the amount of money we want to make. There are many different types of standards that we may have set for our lives, relationships and careers. When it comes to dating I’m sure we’ve all heard of standards and deal breakers. This brings up the question should we ever lower our standards?
Standards V.S Expectations
Many times we confuse standards and expectations when it comes to relationships. I’ve met plenty of people who say “The person I date has to have everything on my list”. The one thing about this statement is there is too much emphasis on what our “list” says. Focusing too much on a list can sometimes lead to unrealistic expectations that can cause us to lose sight of what’s really important to us. Having standers are great for narrowing down our search when looking for someone to date, but sometimes we need to reevaluate if they are truly a standard or just an expectation.
Should You Lower Your Standards?
Often times there is a negative connotation when we think of lowering our standards. Therefore we may feel as if we do settle for something that is less than we “want” we will be miserable and unhappy. This is true in some instances, because some of our standards are deal-breakers. Which are crucial to having a prosperous and healthy relationship. On the hand for example I was having a conversation with a friend of mine and they stated “I’ve been dating someone for the past few months. They are a great person and we always have an amazing time together. The only problem is their not exactly my type when it comes to the looks department”. This statement to some may seem like this person is being shallow and undervaluing the great qualities this person has. Some people may view it as you shouldn’t settle to be someone, because in the end you won’t be happy.
Everyone’s standards are different, because we have different morals, goals, expectations, experiences and background’s which shape our perception on relationships. In the end we have to know what is and isn’t acceptable for us. Would or have you ever lowered your standards? Comment below & if you liked this post please share!
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