3 Signs That Your Relationship is Toxic

One of the hardest things for anyone in a relationship to admit is that their relationship toxic and may need to end. For many of us when we enter a relationship, we’re usually have on rose-colored glasses and become infatuated with our partner. Often times we only focus on our partners good qualities and don’t pay attention to their faults. Therefore, when friends and family tell us what they deem to be some negative qualities and predict the outcome of our relationships we tend to be clueless.  Here are three signs that it might be time to end your relationship.

  1. They don’t allow you to have ‘Personal Time’ – A controlling partner initially feels like a loving partner. Oh, their jealous when you’re out with single people? Of course, they are. Although this can seem like a positive at first a controlling partner isn’t compatible to having a healthy relationship. Relationships are not about monitoring another person, they are about giving complete freedom and seeing that each other’s decisions are aligned. Every person has their own personal needs and the best relationships are ones in which partners fulfill each other’s most important needs. If you find your partner is controlling what you post on social media, who you hang out with or how you dress. Should be taken as a BIG RED FLAG.


  1. Prioritize Your Partner’s Wants & Needs – Early in a relationship, making your partner a priority seems like the right things to do. However, in some cases we can lose ourselves and begin to compromise who we’re as person. Compromises are necessary when two people enter into a relationship, and some disproportion in whose needs are being met more than the other’s is bound to happen. Nevertheless, if you’re constantly expected to rearrange your life around your significant other, and you don’t expect the same flexibility from them, you should take a closer look at why that is happening.


  1. 80/20 Ratio is Off – According to one of the most well-known relationship researchers, John Gottman couples should have at least 80% positive interactions. He states the other 20% will most likely not get resolved. Instead of focusing on conflict, the goal is to enhance the 80%. If you find yourself in a relationship with a ratio slanted towards the negative, it may not be the healthiest.

Final Thoughts

In the end life is too short to be in a relationship that is toxic and causing you mental or physical harm. Our well-being is intricately connected the relationships i.e. family, friends, significant other. Every relationship experiences tough times and it’s worth working on issues to see if it will improve. But when your happiness and well-being are affected for a significant amount of time is not helping to make things better. Therefore, it may be time to go.

Have you ever been in a toxic relationship before? What was the key signs you were in a toxic or negative relationship?

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About Jay Colby

Some would categorize me as an entrepreneur, life coach, son, friend and all of the above. I’m just another person trying to find my way in this world. Until recently, I was unsure what my path in this life would consist of. Like many others I was between I know what I want to do but not sure if that’s what I’m supposed to do. I am currently finishing my degree in something that has nothing to do with becoming a writer or entrepreneur so automatically it qualifies me to become one right! Follow me as I go through this journey called life to impact and encourage one person at a time.
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8 Responses to 3 Signs That Your Relationship is Toxic

  1. Well said, and very much needed to those in a toxic relationship!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. This is great, Jay. I believe one needs to know themselves inside and out before getting into a relationship. I have been in a toxic relationship, but found that the things that made it toxic were amplified by my own lack of self understanding. That was an awakening, and now I understand that in order to love externally and gives someone else the time, respect and care they deserve, I first need to love, respect and care for myself.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Anonymous says:

    I’ve never been in a toxic relationship but I have seen friends in one. I’d say one of the biggest signs is a quick glance at your partner for permission before agreeing to something. That’s a massive red flag to me.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Laura Beth says:

    Been there, done that – Twice. The first one was from 2006-2010. The first year was great, but when we left for college, John literally took control of every aspect of my life, without me realizing it. Once I acknowledged that it wasn’t healthy, that every piece of me was shattered, I broke it off, and put myself back together. The second time was roughly 18 months, from 2014-2016, primarily communicating through Facebook Messenger. This acquaintance from college was very much infatuated with me, which I didn’t realize until much, much later. I bought into his compliments, but things started to feel weird when he wanted to go to a concert with only me, spend a weekend at my parents’ house with only me, and wanting to kiss me, among other things. He eventually blocked me on Facebook, and I’m much happier now. I hope he never comes back!

    Liked by 2 people

  5. jfwknifton says:

    So many people, especially women, for some reason, cannot leave the bad person that they are with. Let’s hope an excellent post will help at least one person to get their life back!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Great post! I have had the toxic boyfriend. He expected me to move mountains for him on my plans, but he was not as equal with his time.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. DatingSphereBlog says:

    A lot of very useful and insightful thoughts on here. Thank you for sharing.

    Liked by 1 person

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